Goodbye Ice World

I am writing this blog as my last words. For tonight, I may freeze to death in my sleep. I live in Toronto folks, the pretty city covered in ice, and no FUCKING POWER!!!! I’M GOING TO TURN INTO A FUCKING POPSICLE! I’M SICKER THEN A DOG! MY SNOT IS FROZEN,
PREVENTING ME FROM BREATHING!
THIS IS THE MOST SLOW AND PAINFUL WAY TO DIE! ICEAGE ALL OVER AGAIN! THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW! FUCK YOU ROB FORD! CALL A STATE OF EMERGENCY ALREADY! OR BEFORE I DIE, I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU! AHHHHHH

Now I’m crying because I think the piece of tissue I stuck in my left nostril to breath, is stuck in there for good :'(!

I want my heating back! πŸ˜₯
I don’t want too die!
How the fuck did the Amish people fucking live like this! Did I even spell Amish right? Fuck it! I don’t care anymore!

I think I got Vicks in my eye! πŸ˜₯ I can’t see!

Snot icicles everywhere!

Emergency! Emergency!

-^-^^_^_^-_________(flatlines)

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7 thoughts on “Goodbye Ice World

  1. hahahahaha is it bad that I laughed through the entire thing? Frozen snot…that’s the worst.
    Um this is probably not a good time to mention that my house has power and heat….

  2. Phew. It’s so hot here in Ottawa. Where there is still power. Must be the foot of snow acting as extra insulation.

    God is clearly punishing Toronto for being mean to Mayor Ford.

    I can courier you a used set of my long johns, if it will help. Size: extra chubby.

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