But I Gotta Have It!

So the other day I was talking to my mom and she decided to poke fun at me about all my crazy “obsessions” growing up. Some of them I thought were pretty fun, others, just weird. Anyway’s! So I decided to make a post about all the things I was apparently “obsessed” with and HAD to have! These are in no particular order at all.

Tamagotchi’s

I was a major die hard junkie for these things! I remember having like 12 at one point all at the same time! If you don’t know what a Tamagotchi is, well then you aren’t cool enough. Basically, it is a needy two-bit animal-alien thing that in order to live and grow, needs to be fed, played with, giving it medication if it gets sick and cleaning it’s shit (literally)..Then they grow up and eventually die. Or you neglect them and they die anyway’s. Really gives a child the sense of responsibility. HA!  The best part about this obsession, I was like 6 or 7 years old and in school all day. Plus, these toys were banned from being in class. SO, my mommy had to take care of all 12 for me :). As she retold the story, one day 4 or 5 of them died because she was too “busy” to take care of them, and when I got home for school I freaked out and accused her of murder. Told her she was a horrible babysitter and I would never leave my children with her again! Oh Jenn HAHA! This faze died at the age of 9 I believe.

Gel Pens

I could NOT get enough of these things! I had boxes and pencil cases FULL of these magical pens!! From glitter, to neon, glow in the dark, pastel, you name it! I was that rainbow child that only wrote in colours. Really pissed off the teachers especially when I wrote with highlighter green or yellow, even attempted writing in white once. Oh the memories! I got a new package once a week! I would cry when one of them stopped working or explode (which happened a lot). There was a point where I couldn’t leave a store WITHOUT a package of gel pens. LOVED them. Still do 🙂

Love2Love Bears

You probably don’t know what the hell these toys are. If you do, I’ll be surprised! This was my other stupid “obsession” that mommy had to take care of. This small key-chain battery operated bear was useless to say the least. It’s soul purpose was that scented baby bottle attached to it. It contained the smell of a certain fruit depending on which colour bear you bought. The bear it’s self had only 2 functions. Make nurturing sounds when you shoved the baby bottle into the hole in it’s face, and his nose would light up like Rudolf the red-nose reindeer. Useless, but NEEDED to have all of them.

Sailor Moon

I needed to be picked up everyday for lunch in elementary school to get my Sailor Moon fix. It was like crack to me. I recorded all the episodes onto VHS tapes so I could re-watch them when it wasn’t on. I had all the character dolls and could re-enact all the episodes with them. Sad I know. Till this day I can still sing the entire theme song. Kill me now.

The Spice Girls

Yep, I was obsessed with them. My room was decked out in posters and spice girl bubble gum stickers. I owned every album and dragged my mom to see their movie in theatres. Also, I ended up watching the movie so much, the VHS tape broke…*sigh* My favourite one was Victoria spice until she turned into Christian Bale from the movie The Machinist.

Pokémon 

Gotta catch them all was right! I was and still am obsessed with Pokémon! Like sailor moon, I needed to watch all the episodes AFTER school, recorded them all on VHS, collected ALL the cards (still have them) owned all the video games (still play them) and even battled the cards in the hallways at school like a loser. I bought a pack of cards a day after school at the local smoke shop with my birthday/Christmas money. I can sing the entire theme song even now! Proudly 🙂

Waffle and Ice Cream Sandwichs

I would want this for breakfast EVERY morning! Actually, I NEEDED this for breakfast every morning! I would refuse to go to school unless I got my Vanilla ice cream and waffle sandwich! Who the hell wants toast and cereal when you can have this godly piece of art?!? Maybe that’s what I was bowling ball when I was younger :/..MEH!

Nintendo Magazines

I hoarded these magazines and still do. I own ALL the retro ones and sometimes like to skim through them for nostalgia. I would read them ALL the time. Even during reading period in school, I would pull 3 or 4 our of my desk to read. Sometimes I would hide them in my actual school books and read them during class or lectures. I unfortunately got caught one day and had them confiscated. Cried for 5 days and wrote a nasty letter to the teacher and principle demanding my life back. My <span style=”text-decoration: underline;”>life</span> back? My god…Child logic.

National Geographic

I had and still have a membership with these guys. I have a bookshelf dedicated to these magazines. I started reading them at the age of 5. I also made a stink of owning my fathers older collection so I could have an “official” collection.  Before a bookshelf, I use to just stack them in the basement near the bar till one day they fell over and almost killed my cat. Death by leaning tower of National Geographic’s anyone?

Kevin Bacon

Okay, I don’t even know how to explain this one. The first movie I had watched him in was Apollo 13, fell madly in love with him, and became “obsessed”…After that movie, I saw Hallow man and I was sold. I wanted to marry this man, possibly bare his child. It was absolutely the funniest thing apparently to my family. My uncle one day while I was at his house just drooling over a DVD cover of Kevin Bacon on it, decided to taunt me and say “Bacon is for eating, not for loving”…*sigh* That “obsessive crush” lasted an entire year. Yikes!

The Sims

This is obviously pertaining to just the initial “The Sims” game. I had played a bootleg version of it one day at my neighbours house and I just HAD to have this game! Who doesn’t want to Simulate their own freaking life?! I want to build a house from scratch and destroy simulated lives for fun! This is all I talked about day and night! At home and at school! I NEEDED it! SO, I saved up money for months till I was able to purchase the game! I remember as if it was yesterday! I got it from Zellers! It costed me 50 something bucks but I was the happiest moron alive! I couldn’t wait to get home and load this bad boy! To my surprise though, when I tried to run and install the CD…NADA…I had failed to look at the operating system requirements to run the game. Windows 95 or higher. Dude, I was sporting a Windows 3.1 like a boss. There was no way this game was going to work. I must of cried from disappointment for like 2 weeks. Searching every possible way to try and make it work on a Windows 3.1..It never happened…a year later, we ended up getting a Windows 98. I also had purchased every single expansion pack in the meantime…Go big or go home.

Aloe Juice

I would pound down 2-3 bottles of these a day. My obsession with this beverage got to the point where I had milked the convenience store DRY! They were out of stock for 2 weeks at one point because of me. I HAD to have aloe juice with every lunch and dinner or I wouldn’t eat. Nuts, absolutely nuts

Popping Blackheads

I had/have a really big obsession with popping these things! Mine and other peoples! I have a horrible habit of scoping them out just about anywhere. You can bet your bottom dollar that if I am talking to you and spot one, chances are I’m dying to ask you to pop them or let me do it. It is SOOOO bad that I have gotten SLAPPED by friends for trying to pop their blackheads without their consent…. It’s sick, I know, I have problems, but I am NOT the only person out there like that. I know many!

Sum 41

When I was in grade 10 there was a point in my life where I could NOT sleep unless I had Sum 41 playing on my walkman (No, I did not own an mp3 player) I would have to put this particular CD on loop every…single…night….after listening to the other songs on different albums at least once. So basically, I had to listen to every Sum 41 song ever made to sleep. What the actual F***!

Disney Underwear

I own about 53 pairs of Disney underwear in total too date. Which of course, I’ve been told not wear any more.. *sad face* I have been told so many times that it is illegal to be with me since it can be considered as paedophilia. What!?!?! Can’t a grown woman not wear what she wants?!?! Besides, Victoria Secret is so yesterday 😛

Fire

So I was and still am a pyromaniac..Besides, the picture says it all! O00h and I love the smell of matches! Mmmmm

 Crossword and Word searches

There would be tons of newspapers with missing squares lying around everywhere! I would buy the newspapers, cut out the crosswords and word searches and then make a booklet out of them. Cause I’m cool like that. Couldn’t just buy an actual book right? *sigh* I would make sure I did 3-4 puzzles a day! It was a MUST. My parents oddly hated this obsession. It lasted 2 years.

Sunflower Seeds

This was the worst obsession/addiction EVER!! It was so unhealthy and messy! I can’t believe I didn’t contract hypertension from all the salt I would intake from these things! I would sit there and by the handful, suck all the salt off, spit them all out, and then proceed to eat them. Watching me do this was beyond disgusting and painful to watch. My mom would sit there and just bitch at me to stop instead of actually taking them away. “Jenn, look at the mess you’re making”… “you’re lips are bleeding”…”you are going to end up choking”..”why are you so repulsive?”… I swear I continued this “obsession” just to piss her off. I miss it.

Christmas

I have and will ALWAYS be OBSESSED with Christmas! My room looks like the North Pole when I am done decorating it. You can find me decked out in Santa hats and reindeer antlers. I’m usually pounding back eggnog and then throwing up because I cant drink milk or consume eggs. (Poison) I have Christmas music on ALL the time. All the radio stations are set to 98.1 CHFI because it’s 24 hours of non stop Christmas music! YAY!!! This can easy piss everyone off. I watch the Santa Clause Parade every year and make people watch it with me ( I hate being happy alone) plus, all those awesome movies and shows like Frosty the Snowman, Rudolf the Red Nose Reindeer, It’s a Wonder life etc…  and! I make sure the Christmas lights and tree are up in November. Obsessed? Nah!

Fishtail Braids

About a year and a half ago, I would do these EVERYDAY just because I wanted wavy pretty hair! I would wake up super early to shower and make them so by the time I had to leave for work, my hair would be dry and wavy when I took the braid out. I do this occasionally now because I am too freaking lazy. It is so worth it though! Pretty HAIR! 🙂

Estrella Damm Beer

New obsession since I came back from Europe is this beer. I cannot get enough of this liquid crack in a can. It is Godly too me. Thank you Spain, thank you.

There you have it. Now you know. I’m nuts. 🙂

 

Just For Fun

100THINGS

 

Yes, you read right! I’m bored and thought this would be something fun to do to pass time.

Well here it goes…100 things.

1) I obviously have nothing better to do since I’m doing this.

2) I love reading and writing.

3) I really enjoy drawing and being creative/artistic.

4) I also love music and anything to do with it. Playing, listening, etc.

5) I am really good with my hands.

6) Numbers 3 and 4 are examples of 5.

7) I massage people for a living. Professionally.. I’m Registered. (also refers to number 5)

8) I’m really afraid of public speaking.

9) I am horrible with communicating my feelings.

10) I hate crying. Although, I do it often.

11) I hate vomiting even more. I tend to cry after I vomit…It’s pathetic really.

12) I resent both of my parents.

13) 7 is my favourite number or anything with 7 in it.

14) I use to sing in the choir until my grade 2 teacher told me I sing like a dog.

15) My favourite colour is currently bright-lime green.

16) It use to be black. Moving up in life.

17) I’ve successfully completed ALL my laundry for the week.

18) Apparently I’m considered over emotional..

19) I like to call it being sensitive.

20) I can taste the difference between Pepsi and Coke.

21) I love video games. Pc, PlayStation, Nintendo, you name it, I’ve most likely played it.

22) I am 75% Italian, 20% German, and 5% Polish.

23) I have over 5 calendars and agendas/schedulers but never use them.

24) I have four pets currently. Two dogs and two cats.

25) One of the dogs actually belongs to me. I bought him for $800 .

26) So he’s legally mine

27) I named him Nocello.

28) I have a sister and 3 half sisters.

29) I use to have a rabbit named Pepper and a Parrot named Pete when I was younger.

30) I really need to pee.

31) I am Catholic.

32) I worked from the age of 11 at a banquet hall.

33) I had to pay for my own education if I ever wanted to amount to something.

34) If I get jealous, it’s for an actual reason.

35) I painted my toe nails bright-highlighter-Yellow cause I can.

36) I have a a bleeding heart.

37) I love helping people.

38) Number 37 conflicts with number 36.

39) I am petrified of sharks.

40) My greatest fear actually is a plane crashing into the ocean and still being alive, but then a shark eats me.

41) I realize how stupid number 40 sounds so, shut up.

42) I always have to sleep with a pillow either between or under my legs.

43) I love roller-coasters and extreme rides.

44) I will try anything at-least once!

45) But if it doesn’t please all senses, I’ll never eat it again.

46) Most people probably stopped reading this at number 4.

47) I dropped French class after grade 9.

48) I regret high school and wish I could do it over again.

49) I love to play music REALLY LOUD!

50) I actually screamed that in my head as I typed it. Thought you should know.

51) I love older music. Anything from the 50’s to late 90’s.

52) I hate my body ratio.

53) Let me rephrase that. It’s ass to love handle ratio.

54) I cannot stand romantic movies and chick flicks.

55) I only saw American Pie 1 for the first time 2 weeks ago.

56) I took up blogging a few years ago because, I think writing in a diary is lame.

57) I own and use 2 diary’s fairly often.

58) I like feedback from people that actually read the shit I write.

59) I enjoy reading other peoples blogs.

60) I’m still deciding on what to do with my life.

61) I just finished my first Real Estate course exam on Saturday.

62) I think I failed, but wont know till midweek or later.

63) I’m super impatient when it comes to waiting for grades or test results.

64) I fear failing at anything at all times.

65) I’m afraid of ending up alone.

66) I’m considered photogenic.

67) It takes me one minute and 3 seconds to do my hair.

68) I can stay up all night just laughing and telling jokes.

69) Sometimes my laugh can disturb the peace of the public.

70) I’ve been told I sound like Bart Simpson when I laugh.

71) Thank God Bart Simpson’s voice is done by a female.

72) I own EVERY season of Family Guy.

73) I can imitate Lois Griffin’s voice.

74) I love sunflowers.

75) And sunflower seeds.

76) I don’t care if people like me or not.

77) Unless they are people that have to be around me all the time.

78) I still need to pee.

79) I chew way too much gum.

80) I have gum packs everywhere.

81) My sister is 2 years younger.

82) She use to steal all my clothes and personal belongings.

83) This is why I purposely put a lock on my bedroom door.

84) I just put a piece of gum in my mouth.

85) Nom, Nom, Nom.

86) It’s spearmint. Yum.

87) My only bad habit was biting my nails but, I stopped 2 years ago.

88) First time I shaved my downstairs was in grade 7.

89) I felt bald.

90) the only reason I did it was because my best-friend told me too.

91) Math was never my forte.

92) I love spicy food.

93) Cinnamon is my favourite spice.

94) I should really go pee before I get another bladder infection or it explodes.

95) I have a horrible sweet-tooth.

96) I sometimes skip out on food, but devour dessert.

97) Especially Chocolate.

98) I carry around my Iphone and Ipod Touch.

99) I’m certain no one is reading this. (Maybe Paul =D)

100) 100! Okay I’m done. Bathroom time!

 

 

 

 

 

Romantic

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Are you a romantic?
Hell, I know I’m not. But, I do have a part of me that would like to embrace that mushy side. Somewhere deep, deep, down. I guess it’s whatever you consider romantic right?

I was scolded today by one of my girlfriends on how I’m not “romantic” enough. What the freaking hell does that even mean?!? Not romantic enough? Pfft. What list or guide is there that specifies there being enough romantic or not? I’m plenty romantic!

So I don’t like flowers or love letters, or poetry, or fancy candle light dinners. Does that make me anti romantic? Is that even a word? Did I just make that up!? You know what I like? I like wine, and music. You know what’s romantic to me? Listening to 70s or 80s music and drinking wine. Maybe even a random slow dance to set the mood. No, I’m not a jamming alcoholic, but those two do go well together.

Like come on. I know some people like all that jazzed up crap but, don’t you think that’s a little planned and unnatural? Coming home to a candle light dinner is code for, “I’m gunna hump you tonight because I have grounds too.” Before you go off on the whole “it’s a sign of appreciating” bullshit, tell me there’s no intention or motive there at all! Spur of the moment is romantic! Songza can set the mood in moments if you choose the right playlist, and I don’t mean the category “getting lucky”.

This is rambling bullshit. Moral of the story is, I’m a realist! Romance my ass!
🙂

Perfect Girl

Look, we all need to take the time to remind ourselves of our worth sometimes. Once in a while it’s good to take a step back and just fucking inflate your ego a bit. So screw what you think, this is me time. Why not do this on a piece of paper in your bedroom or in your diary like a good little girl. No! Lick my nuts! I’m doing it here on the net so everyone can see how freaking special I am…NOT

Let me start off by saying, there is no such thing as perfect. EVER. NO ONE IS PERFECT. You are only perfect in your own way.

If you are reading this, it is possible you are thinking of one or more of the following things;

a) She is clearly pissed off about something.

b) What, your boyfriend is being a dick again?

c) Oh, it’s “I hate my life” time and your posting this to make yourself feel better

d) She’s clearly not getting any and is sexually frustrated.

e) Typical; fucking female post

f) Why are there so many fucking options!?! FUCK

You know what! I actually think I am a perfect catch, so you can kiss my ass! Here is why.

Reason number 1

I am hard working. Yes, very hard working. I put my blood, sweat, and spit into EVERYTHING and ANYTHING that I do. (Sometimes tears….always tears..shut up)

Reason number 2

I am domesticated! I cook, clean, know how to scrub a toilet, (that’s a life skill by the way). I do all that housewife shit without being a stupid housewife. Also handy with tools and other shit that males use. Try finding that in 50% of women these days. That’s right! You can’t! Oh NO! I broke a nail..Shove it princess.

Reason number 3

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I’m not repulsed by your abused bodily functions. You farting or burping will not send me running away with arms flailing. Although I may not pass gas around you (too lady like for that) I defiantly might make you look like a little bitch in a belching contest. To some, that’s disgusting, others; that’s hot.

Reason number 4

I am dedicated and passionate about what I’m in/who I’m with/what I’m doing. That doesn’t really need explaining. You get the point. Too much to type anyway’s 😛

Reason number 5

I am NOT your “typical” girl. Here is why

-Usually considered one of the guys for the most part.

-I am not materialistic AT all. I HATE jewellery. Unless it’s seashells on string or some nature shit. You can keep that $59875874324.45 dollar purse made from alligator dick, I’m good thanks. No, I’m not a hippy.

– I would rather eat in a hole in the wall dive compared to a fancy restaurant

– I probably talk less then you. I actually don’t talk THAT much. Surprise Surprise 😉 But I can hold a conversation that’s meaningful and loaded. No drama. Never Drama. Oh My GAWD! Guess what SUSY said TODAY!!!…Die

– Chick flick or explosions? EXPLOSIONS !

– Barbies? Nahhh, hot-wheels!

– Wtf is reality Tv? Soaps still exist?

– I HATE dressing up. I like my sweats and jeans, runners and boots. What the fuck is a dress? An expensive piece of material that you can’t do anything in but look pretty and wave. God forbid you sit the wrong way and your vagina shows. How am I supposed to scream “Race ya!” In 9 inch heals that could possibly strike oil?! Although, on special occasions, I do clean up very well and know how to dress like a lady, not a slut. Sorry if I offended any one. Actually, no I’m not.

– I hate shopping. Can’t stand malls. When I do shop, its like a game show. How fast can you get in and get the FUCK out!

– I play/watch sports. You dig?

– ^ No I’m not a ghetto fabulous retard.

– I hate mushy nicknames, relationship babble, all that horse shit nonsense. VOMIT. I love you is fine. Cut the crap. I’m not your hunny bunches of oats, or your snookums, your princess fucking peach, whatever other shit is out there. I’m fine with penis wrinkle or dickweed, or fuck tart. I think it’s cute. Don’t judge me

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Reason number 6

I don’t wear make-up. Ever. Seriously. EVER. Even if I have the largest, juiciest, most obnoxious ZIT on my face. There will be no make-up used to cover it. It will look you in the face until it explodes or finally goes away. Deal with it. My face is my face. It is all natural. Whether you like it or you don’t, I could give 2 shits. Would you fancy some cake?

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Reason number 7

I take care of myself. Lets face it, you already know I have issues with my weight. I’m CONSTANTLY calling myself fat, larger then life, house sized, I am the real Moby-Dick. I’ve said it all. But the truth is, I watch what I eat and exercise daily. I am not and will never be a lard ass who sits on my ass and absorbs the couch watching soaps. Even the day I have kids, I know that I will be one of those freaks that NEED to get their body back. See? Winner 🙂

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Reason number 8

I play fucking video games! Yes, I am a gamer. I’ve owned almost every gaming console ever made. (expect for X-box BARF) and no, I don’t play Barbies animal rescue or Mary- Kate and Ashley’s’s golf ..*Scoff*

Reason number 9

I am and will be your number one fan/ believer! No matter what crazy idea or dreams you have, if I see how bad you want something and are willing to work towards it, I will stand behind you 110%, even if the odds are zero and unrealistic.

Reason number 10

I am independent. Seriously, what is worse then having a girlfriend or partner that needs to be attached to you at the hip 24/7? Example, I can do my own thing while you do yours. Even if we are in the same room together, we don’t have to BE together. Just you being there is enough. No need for suffocation.

Reason number 11

Family oriented. Lets face it shall we. There are way too many horror stories of the controlling wife/in-laws. For the most part, females like to start their own family and like to call the shots. I’ve seen this WAY too much. It sickens me. Families being torn apart and for what? I like being integrated and have no problems with family men and a “mamas boy”. Yes, I am the girl you want to bring home to your parents, trust me.

Reason number 12

I can count how many sex partners I have on one hand! Can you? Sex is not a joke. Just because your dating them, doesn’t mean you have to spread them.

Last but not least,

Reason number 13

Marriage to me is NOT a joke. I would not make that jump unless 100% ready. Divorce rates are WAY too high for my liking and no, I will not take you for half. That’s the perk about me. Equality and fairness. You bring half, you take your half. We buy a car, shit hits the fan, we sell the car and split the amount. FAIR. “I would like to plead emotional abuse” -Here , you get EVERYTHING. We get away with way too much because we have a baby making box bundle. This, sickens me.

There is way too much honestly to list, but these are the first things that come to mind when I think of the positives of why dating me isn’t compared to hell.Maybe I’m being full of myself, who the hell knows. Maybe everything I listed is a big fat “HELL NO” to some men or women out there. Who knows and who the cares! Kiss my semi-fat derrière.

Okay I’m done. I feel better about myself now.

This is a pretty annoying pompous post though I must say. Especially for my first 2014 post. Ah well. SUCK IT

With love;

Jenna

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Top 10 Christmas Movies

1) The Grinch

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I love this movie! Jim Carey is my all time favorite actor! His face alone makes me die!

2) The Santa Claus

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A classic of course. Not really much to say. That’s me everyday in the morning. Fuck I’ve put on weight.

3) Bad Santa

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This movie is just bad! I’m sorry, children should NOT be watching this! I only watch it for that fat kid.
Fat kid- “Should I fix you some sandwiches?”
Willie- “I don’t want any fucking sandwiches. What is it with you and fixin’ fucking sandwiches?”
AHAHAHH! … Sorry…

4) Miracle on 34th Street

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Another classic. Just love it.

5) The Polar Express

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Need I say anything. Believe.

6) The Muppets Christmas Carol

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It’s the fucking muppets. Their awesome. Enough said.

7) A Charlie Brown Christmas

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Who doesn’t love Peanut’s?!

8) Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer

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Who doesn’t enjoy animal porn?

9) Frosty The Snowman

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Teaching children it’s okay to be retarded…. Happy Burfday!

10) A Christmas Story

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Ugly leg Lamp for the win.

Naughty Or Nice List?

Ello! I was bored so I decided to Google a Naughty or Nice List test for shits and giggles! The answers are between stars (*) followed by some stupid shit I would say- ha ha!

  1. What did you get in your stocking last year?

    • Candy
    • I have no idea. Who cares about the stocking?
    • Some really nice gifts
    • *If someone wants to “get in my stockings”, they’ve just gotta buy me dinner first.*(I’m clearly kidding….I don’t even own a stocking wahhhhh 😥
  2. Have you ever sneaked a peek at your Christmas presents?

    • No! That’s naughty! And it ruins the surprise.
    • *When I was a kid, but only once.*(This could possibly be a lie. I said possibly right?)
    • Yup. Every year.
    • Depends…are YOU my Christmas present? ::wink::
  3. Do you re-gift?

    • *No* (This is actually very true.)
    • I think once, maybe
    • Every year I re-gift at least one thing
    • All the time, if I can’t return the crappy gift.
  4. When the weather outside is frightful, you like to stay home and cuddle with what?

    • *A teddy bear* (I’m a giant child)
    • A nice book
    • A nice drink
    • A good-looking hottie
  5. If you’ve been nice and not naughty, what kind of present should Santa bring you?

    • I’m a girl. Santa should bring me a girl present if I’m nice.
    • *I’m a boy. Santa should bring me a boy present if I’m nice.* (Look, I don’t want barbies or an easy bake oven..Give me VIDEO GAMES- RAWR)
  1. Have you ever dressed up as Santa?

    • *No, but it might be fun.* (Where can I find a good fat suit?..Oh wait, where’s the cookies?)
    • No, that’s lame.
    • Yes, it’s all about spreading Holiday cheer
    • Yes, for that hottie I mentioned earlier!
  2. If you discovered Santa Claus trapped in your chimney, what would you do?

    • Help him out
    • Hop in the sleigh and take over to make sure the gifts get to everyone in time
    • Hop in the sleigh and help yourself to the gifts
    • *Ha! Ha! Tickle Santa…I can’t help myself.* (That’s the psycho in me 😀 )
  3. What are you giving to your special someone for Christmas this year?

    • I’ll carefully figure out what they want and surprise them.
    • I’m not sure yet, but I’ll figure something out.
    • Ugh…do we have to exchange gifts this year? How about cash.
    • *Me!* (I lie. I got him Three Days Grace concert tickets and his favourite soccer teams training Jacket. Ahem..Spoiled much?)
  4. You find out your crazy Aunt is knitting you another fugly sweater this year. What do you do?

    • Kindly accept. She works hard on those.
    • Nod and smile. Just nod and smile.
    • Conveniently forget to take it home with you.
    • *Subtly express your feelings by burning it in effigy.* (NOT! I LOVE those hideous Christmas sweaters! Wtf does effigy mean?)
  5. What treat are you planning on leaving Santa this year?

    • Cookies and Milk
    • *A healthy treat for Santa and carrots for the reindeer!* (Yah, get it together fat ass before you die of a heart attack!)
    • Nothing. I’m not stupid.
    • Me!
  1. Your friend didn’t get you anything last year. What do you get them this year?

    • I get them something every year.
    • *We’ll figure out if we’re exchanging gifts, I don’t want them to feel bad.* (More like if they get me something, I have no choice but to get them something. Bad friend ALERT)
    • Screw them!
    • Hmmm…they must not be a good friend!
  2. What is your favorite Christmas movie?

    • “Miracle on 34th Street”
    • *”A Charlie Brown Christmas”* (NONE OF THE ABOVE! Where the hell is the Grinch?!?)
    • “Bad Santa”
    • “Love Actually” – lots of hotties in that movie…
  3. Who is your favorite reindeer?

    • *Rudolph* (DUH)
    • Donner
    • Vixen
    • Is “Craphead” a reindeer? (LOL this is pretty funny though)
  4. Santa isn’t just for kids, you know. How old are you, anyway?

    •         Dec 15, 1989 (too old for Santa 😉 )
  5. Would you go back to school to get smarter?

    • *Yes, I want to be smarter than my friends* (Who the hell asks this question? I don’t really know what this has to do with being naughty or nice :/ more like pompous or jealous)
    • No, I’m plenty smart already

    My Results:

    Nice
    You are sugar and spice, so the list you’re on is “Nice”! Christmas for you is a time of giving and sharing – the important stuff. You spread holiday cheer by being grateful for the real gifts in your life. Merry Christmas to All and to All a Good Night!
^^
This is clearly a load of shit. Hot steaming Giraffe shit. Nice? Nice my ass! What kind of farce ass answer is that? Based on my answers, the results should of been- “You are on the Santa wants you to kill yourself  list.”
These are the lamest questions by far! Like honestly! Where are genuine questions like – “Did you kill anyone this year?” or “Did you tell  your nasty pootang supervisor to fall on a sharp rusty knife?” ..THOSE are questions you SHOULD be asking to declare someone naughty or nice. Jeeze
Well anyway’s, hope you enjoyed that as much as I did. Which if your normal, would be a 0 on a scale of 1-10. HA.
Nut-Cracker. Cracker of Nuts. Nuts that Crack.
Shut up.
Hillary-Clinton-nutcracker

Dominican 2013

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Back to reality! Boo! 😦 Yes folks, I am back from my vacation to the Dominican Republic.

Can’t complain about my trip at all except for those seriously annoying beach vendors that in comparison, are like fucking seagulls. Weather was great, food was good, drinks were yummy, the ocean was sexy. Instead of boring you with words, I come barring photos instead! 😀

ENJOY!

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Flight in

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Wind Surfing

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Our resort- Viva Wyndham Tangerine In Puerto Plata
Corner Right – Ginger German, Rare

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A random cave 🙂

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Cave Photo of Matt and I

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Amazing Artist who turned glass into ANYTHING you wanted.

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Two Mexicans?

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Relaxing in the shade

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Say hello to my little friend! This bugger attached himself to my sandal and would not let go!

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Palm Tree loving

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Attacked by love birds

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Matt and his friends

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Matt and I with insane love-birds

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I look majestic with love-birds 😉

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Feeding Toucan Sam

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Crazy pair of Dolphins

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Matt and I with Serena

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Kisses from Serena

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Having fun on the beach!

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African Dance show – Night entertainment

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Dinner by the pool on our last night. 😦