October?

Uh…Where the hell did October go? I swear a week ago it was September and we are already in the second last week! Did I slip into a comma of some sort? Being older blows! Time flies way too fast with age.

Anyway, October is one of my favourite months! The gorgeous colours, the comfortable crisp weather, all the festivals and shows that come to Toronto, and of course Halloween!

This month has been pretty eventful I must say. Maybe that’s why it ended so fast.

I went apple picking the day after Thanksgiving. I made apple sauce for DAYS! Did you know you can cause yourself serious constipation with the over consumption of apple sauce? No wonder babies get so easily backed-up ! They are fed way too much apple piss.

Just yesterday I had the luxury of attending Buffer Festival thanks to my best friend Melissa, and seeing one of my many favourite YouTubers! I was so nervous and excited that after the meet and greet… My legs were so shaky I fell down the stairs exiting the stage. Of course leave it to me to make a complete ass out of myself. Moments before I even got on stage, I had a hard laugh at another female who had fallen down the exact stairs in utter shock from meeting her idol. Karma?

November is just around the corner which means it’s time to break out the festive decor!! I can let the Christmas whore out for the next 2 months 😉
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

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November is also the time of the year you stop wasting money on razors and waxing !

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Okay I’m just kidding, that is beyond repulsive. At least keep Jumanji in your underwear.

&& Photo Booth

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Large Fruit

So, keeping busy for the past few days. Studying away for my Real Estate exam that I’m pretty sure I’m going to FAIL! Since I left the class we have all been keeping each other posted via email if we’ve passed the exam. Everyday that I check my email I get another update on another classmate that has successfully passed the exam. Yippee! ….I guess when they don’t hear from me it’s safe to say I failed right?

Well on top of all this “excitement”, I recently found out on Monday that I have an Ovarian cyst. Excellent! Just what I wanted! I went for an ultrasound for my bladder that is purposely destroying my life every waking minute by inflaming it’s goddamn self for NO reason. Not to mention that I’m highly allergic to every antibiotic known to mankind! Pretty sure my purpose in life was to be terminated by itself.

Anyways, so I’m in for this bladder ultrasound when the technician goes out of his way to “inform” me of this lovely news. To my understanding, you are just an ultrasound technician and you aren’t entitled to disclose this information to me. Thanks for literally SHOWING me this cyst the size of a freaking grapefruit dangling from my right ovary.
“Look here, do you see that? Do you see what I’m looking at?”
“….. Oh you mean that large black circle that takes up 90% of the screen. Yah I see it”

He then proceeds to inform me that I need a internal ultrasound camera inspection…. A what?

” Are you sexually active?”

“….depends on what test your planning on doing”

He then shows me this full out contraption with a camera on the end of it. After staring at it for a total of 27 seconds I calmly reply with,

“… I am 100 % positive that I’m a virgin and therefor, you are forbidden to use that.”

After 15 minutes of conversing back and forth of how important this test is, he then decides to inform me that it could possibly be because of my menstrual cycle and that it could just pop on its own.

…. Okay? And if it doesn’t? Then the next option is removal right?

So let me explain to you how I’ve been trying everything in my power to purposely try as pop this thing!
I hold my breath and try and create internal pressure. I push on the area and with every thrust I scream out POP! When I don’t think it’s working I resort to yelling at it.. POP YOU SON OF A BITCH! POP!
I engage in extreme physical activity, such as explosive leg and abdominal exercises. And when I feel pain, I run to the bathroom to check in hopes to find good news…. But nope. Nada.

So! … The internal examination is on Monday and well… I DON’T WANNA 😥

Watch, it’s gunna pop during the Real Estate exam. Knowing my shitty luck, BAM In the Ovary!..Exam is on Saturday morning… *Sigh*

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Oh my Jen, what’s that freakishly large breakfast fruit doing on your OVARY -.-

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

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First off, yes this is a picture of me. Photo Credit goes to my best friend Melissa C!

This photo was taken in 2010 for my friends practice and portfolio. A basic photo-shoot, that’s all.

Yesterday, I had changed my Facebook profile picture to this shot. Why? I simply liked it. It expresses the way I feel lately. Dark, down, hopeless, scared. When I look at this photo, I see art. I see a photo that was taken professionally for my friends experience.

What do you see? I want honesty because I am angry, completely livid. My boyfriend today decided to FREAK out at me today,while I was at work for using this as my profile photo. “This photo is way too provocative, sends the wrong message, is this what you do on Facebook?!” and a bunch of other shit he said that I purposely did not commit to memory. I don’t see my boobs hanging out! My ass isn’t showing! I’m not eating a banana looking seductively into the camera. What the hell is the matter with this photo!?

Anyway’s, he really upset me and I decided to take it down to make him shut up.

If someone is seeing something that I am NOT seeing, please feel free to give it to me straight.

– One pissed off Jenna